Family or career? Real estate after kids
I still remember being an ambitious 26-year-old, engaging in important discussions with my partner about our future. When do we get married? How many kids do we want? Simultaneously, I was weighing these personal goals against my professional aspirations, striving to find a balance between the two.
I was five years into my commercial real estate career when I began to feel restless. I became open to the idea of transitioning from an operations role to a brokerage role, but this coincided with my engagement and plans to start a family with my partner. The prospect of this decision filled me with apprehension, and I felt the need to plan everything out and execute it to perfection, otherwise everything would fall apart.
I loved my job, and I came to realize that I had intricately woven my professional life into my identity, prompting me to question my sense of self beyond my career. The real estate market is a fast-paced environment that never dulls down and waits for no one. “Clients need their requirements fulfilled and I was very fearful about losing my place within my team,” commented Sophie Nguyen, Operations Manager, Capital Markets at JLL Montreal.
Real estate is demanding but the flexibility cannot be understated, especially when we factor the establishment of work from home protocols created during COVID. The success of videoconferencing and other technologies made room for long-term implementation of work flexibility which is key for all parents. I knew coming back from maternity leave would require some adjustments, but I was confident in knowing that if my son needed me, I could easily clock in at home and meet my deliverables.
Coming back from maternity leave, several former and current colleagues chose to remain in their current roles while several others took different career paths. Some opted for new positions within the real estate sector, while others ventured into completely different industries. Mallory Weldon, Vice President, Industrial Leasing, Southwestern Ontario, was already a broker when she had her children, and she recounts the unwavering support she received from her team that enabled for a smooth return from her maternity leaves into the same role she held prior to her leaves. She shared that her team closed the gap in her workload at a time when she was needed at home. “The importance of surrounding yourself with great people who take a long-term view on relationships cannot be understated,” she added.
Though I was eager to pursue a brokerage role, I considered the recommendations of many friends. They advised me to delay any career moves since I had to consider the shift in my priorities as a mother. Returning to my previous position after maternity leave was beneficial but only in the short-term, as it provided a familiar environment while I navigated the challenges of new parenthood. As I reflected on my position, I realized it no longer aligned with my long-term career objectives. Nevertheless, this realization enhanced my understanding of the diverse career paths available both within my firm and across the wider real estate brokerage sector. At this point, I had now come face-to-face with two of my biggest fears, which were largely driven by my self-sabotaging narrative: having a baby and career stagnation.
The opportunity to make my own career move happened when my son was almost three. The opening was there, and I was primed for change. Seeing as I was a boomerang hire, my return to JLL was quite smooth even as I moved into a brokerage role. My expectations were clear, and more importantly, the work environment JLL offers is a positive one to grow in. My colleague Laurence Duhamel, Retail Leasing Director at JLL Montreal, made her career move at the tail end of her leave. “Joining JLL post-maternity leave presented unique challenges, but I was fortunate to have supportive co-workers I could rely on for assistance,” shared Laurence.
In Canada, we are privileged to have a year of parental leave, one that I personally shared with my partner. Women have historically been considered as the primary caregiver and we still carry the weight of choosing to bear children or to stay active in the workforce. Parenthood is a life-changing commitment, and I feared that the burden of responsibilities would fall on me, hence why I attribute one key life decision as the most crucial to allow a professional progression: choosing the right partner. “When both parents work full-time, family responsibilities must be a team effort, otherwise it would be a real challenge,” commented Laurence.
There are many online discussions about the changing parenting landscape happening with my generation, which largely emphasizes Millennial Dads. My partner is the epitome of the Millennial Dad, and I can count on him for everything and anything regarding our son. I cannot stress how much pressure this alleviates for me as a mother. I have a supportive and dedicated partner, and I know that I would not have been able to work late nights, attend work events, nor study for my brokerage license without him. Due to his career in healthcare and working with patients, he is required to respect his traditional 9-5 hours, whereas I am the one with more work flexibility on the day-to-day.
Another millennial parent is my colleague Dominic Bonin, Senior Vice President of JLL’s Industrial team in Montreal. He recently celebrated his son’s first birthday, and I asked how he and his wife managed their home life. “There are her days and there are my days, and real estate allows for flexibility in changing the routine when needed,” he said. Dominic also noted that our generation is more aware of the importance of both parents’ role in building a family as a dual-income household, a sentiment which we see reflected more and more by our clients as well.
Timing isn’t everything and fear shouldn’t drive your decision-making. The question “Family or career?” isn’t about choosing one over the other, but rather about finding your internal balance to integrate them both, even if it implies change. There will always be moments of doubt and hurdles to overcome, but there’s also triumph in these new challenges. As Laurence pointed out, “JLL’s values, emphasizing flexibility and understanding of family commitments, have been invaluable to my career plans and it is built on mutual trust.” You are strong enough to focus and create your own path and succeed, both as a parent and in your career. However, a solid partner and a supportive work environment, combined with the flexibility inherent in real estate, makes the possibility of pursuing both family and career aspirations that much healthier.
Retrospectively, I would have chosen to change jobs and have my son earlier, but you cannot dwell on the past. I am adjusting as I go instead of being driven by fear. Your life may look different than it did before, and that’s okay. Returning to real estate after maternity leave is about redefining your professional self while embracing your new role as a parent.
by Christina Bachner
Associate
JLL
Translated by the author
